Wednesday, October 29, 2008
This Child is NOT a Vegan...
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Zaleeya vs. Ziggy, Round One
After the NIGHTMARE grueling flights we landed on US soil happy to be home, hoping we sail through the “green card” process at the airport. Unfortunately we were displeased to find out we were supposed to have received a “cover sheet” to our visa packet from Kolkata. After numerous attempts to convince them we didn’t receive one while I was melting down trying to calm a hungry baby, we got our green card were off to greet the family. Luckily Zaleeya was miraculously in a wonderful mood to greet both grandmas, Saleem Uncle, Melanie Aunty and cousin Kaden (10 months). Luckily baby Kaden had some food to share with Zaleeya (to help melting mom) and she fell right asleep once in the car seat! I was pleased as this had been a source of stress for us both. No car seats in India!
We approached the house as we suddenly realized that our baby was going to meet her “best friend” Ziggy soon! Even in her slightly foggy state she reached for him immediately as we let out a collective sigh, happy to see she wasn’t afraid. Ziggy on the other hand seem to sniff and wander around a bit displeased. Since it was supposed to be 11pm we put Zaleeya back to sleep hoping it would last, however at 4am she was wide awake at the displeasure of both parents working on only 2-3 hours of sleep! However these moments were most precious as she started to explore her open spaces and crawl all over. She smiled giggled, reached for Ziggy a lot and ate well. However the meltdowns started again and there were a few hours of the whole household suffering for a bit as she eventually went down for a nap (thanks to Daddy!).
While napping we called in reinforcements in the form of Saleem Uncle and Melanie Aunty with cousin Kaden and what a difference it made! I think it was good for Zaleeya to be around another baby again and WONDERFUL for the parents to have people to ask a ton of questions of! Also, the time passed and baby Z got super tired. I’m happy to report that as of 10pm she is fast asleep (in her own crib). Again, let’s hope it lasts.
I look forward to watching more interactions in the coming days, though I must admit to still feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. How in the world am I ever going to handle all this when Azeem gets back to work???
Oh and as for Round One, Zaleeya wins hands down. Poor Ziggy was chased around by a crawling baby all day. So far his only advantage is his speed, but one day she’ll catch him!
Friday, October 24, 2008
Planes, puffs and panic
To say things are "hunky dorey" would be a lie. Little Z is still coming out of her shell, which would be a good thing except for the 30 hour travel time home! This is more than a little bit crazy... Where is my concord jet?
You have two inexperienced parents on two back to back 10 hour plane flights with a still traumatized little girl discovering her voice, her ability to throw toys and tantrums. Add in the sleeplessness and teething and you have a fun time!
Here is what we have learned from our first flight:
1. Wear clothes you don't mind getting food all over, and bring changes for everyone!
2. Bulkhead seats with bassinet is the only way to go. Even if she doesn't sleep in it at least its storage for all the crap!
3. The bottle is your friend. Always have one ready and throw all notions of a eating and sleeping schedule out the window! Also feed them in the bassinet so if they fall asleep you don't have to move them. :)
4. Don't bother bringing entertainment for yourself. Those days are over.
5. Snack snack snacks! The puff snacks have worked wonders for us.
6. Learn how to change a diaper with your kid standing up. Seriously.
7. Patience patience patience. All I can think is "there's no place like home!".
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Wednesday, October 22, 2008
The Marvels of Adoption
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Little Z's BIG First Day
For the first few hours all she did was cry. She wouldn't even look us in the face for fear of realizing she had not idea who we are. Finally after a few hours she latched on to a toy, ate a few bites and relaxed just a bit. In fact we saw a little smiling when we played some music and she moved to the beat. A dancer we think!
Around 9pm last night she took most of her bottle and actually fell asleep and slept for 12 FULL hours! It was crazy. We actually had to wake her up in the morning. Today has been better. The winy crying has reduced, she ate a full day full of meals, pooped twice (I think this is normal??) and smiled a lot more. It's like watching a turtle emerge from a shell. Every once in a while she looks at me and grabs at certain features, like she is learning my face. Other times she grabs on super tight as has no desire to look at who she is grabbing on to. We can literally see her grieving in front of our eyes. We got a good taste of this grief at dinner tonight when she WAILED uncontrollably, while mommy cried with her. I must say we feel quite responsible for her grief- taking her from her home she knows and loves. But then she smiles and we realize that this is part of the bonding process. It's quite amazing.
By the way, there is some wonderful shopping in this area around our hotel (The Kenilworth). Pantaloons is amazing for kids stuff! We got 20 items (clothes/ diapers) for equivalent of $100. So I recommend to any Dillon mom to wait to do major shopping until you get here. We put her in the baby bjorn and it made for a good adventure. Easy 7 min walk away- though it is the streets of India so walk carefully!
We're including as many pics as possible. I need to sign off now as I'm exhausted. I am beginning to understand this whole "tired mother" thing.
PS We got the visa thing done. It was quite easy as the paperwork from Delhi arrived quickly. She is ready to go home! We will wait until Friday though- we feel we all need the adjustment time.Monday, October 20, 2008
Little "Z" Day!
Then we headed back to pick up Zaleeya/Pratima for good. Luckily she had fallen asleep while we were gone which made her a lot more mellow for the car ride home. She rested on mommy's chest for the ride. Since then we've managed 2 diaper changes and a yummy banana/milk meal. She is taller than we expected- very long and skinny arms and legs! She is obviously very traumatized and upset and crying a lot. We hope this will subside in time. I think we are all a bit shellshocked! We are feeling very sad for her as we know she misses her ayahs.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
On the Eve of Motherhood
"It takes courage to push yourself to places you've that never been before. To test your limits. To break through barriers. And then the day came that the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud, was more painful then the risk it took to blossom."
Please keep reading our blog, as the journey has only just begun.
So You Think You're a Good Driver??
Lastly, two more important things to note, seatbelts are rarely used if at all available in cabs and they drive on the wrong side of the road (like in Great Britain). I am really looking forward to getting into my car, strapping on a seatbelt, and driving on the 405, in my own lane... :)
Thursday, October 16, 2008
The Greatest Love Story
It’s hard to explain, but the magnificence of this monument is overwhelming. With the sun rising and the crowds beginning to pour in, the grounds came alive and the beauty unfolded. Something that is difficult to see in pictures is the details and texture of the stone. The marble has many facets to it, and the sunlight at different times of day makes the stone look different colors. After an hour of wandering around taking pictures at multiple angles, we still didn’t want to leave and kept looking behind us before we walked away.
But an even bigger surprise is the story behind the Taj Mahal. Built in the 1600’s by the 4th Mogul (Muslim) Emperor Shah Jahan, this building took 20,000 workers everyday for 22 years to construct. It was built in honor of his 3rd wife, Mumtaz who died giving birth to her 14th child. Their love was so great that he built this monument for her after her death.
But let me back up for a second. Yes, she was Shah Jahan’s third wife (of 4!) and he even had many other “unofficial wives”. This was a time when marriages were often not for love, but for political gains and a blending of blood lines. And men took multiple wives. But yet despite this, a man loved a woman and together they married against the wills of their families and lived for 19 years. Mumtaz was the only wife that bore his children and after her death he took no more wives. In fact Shah Jahan’s son eventually took power from him and imprisoned him in the Red Fort where he died on a balcony that directly faced the Taj Mahal.
So in this land of surprises, we find a love story so great that millions come from around the world to see its monument. It’s been an appropriate way to start winding down our days of travel and get ready for OUR family love story ahead.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Azeem's Excellent Adventure in Delhi!
We started our day using the car and driver that will eventually take us to Agra tomorrow. Our first stop was to the US Embassy to file for Zaleeya’s VISA, luckily there was no American Holiday today! We got in line about 8:45 and were ushered in about 45 minutes later. The inside of the Embassy grounds was like a park, quite tranquil and serene. The only people we saw while walking to the USCIS office were gardeners working on the gardens and lawns. We spent another hour and a half in the waiting room, until we were called in for our meeting. We were a little nervous, well actually I was really nervous, since the paperwork has been my responsibility to complete. We went through the paperwork one item at a time and then the processor asked us about our address, which was kind of weird. We said it’s in “Irvine” he replied “yes I know, but where in Irvine is your house”, so Zeena said, “off Sand Canyon and the 405”. I’m thinking, how did we just get into a conversation about a freeway and directions to our house with an adoption processor in India? Well come to find out he LIVES in IRVINE! We just travelled 8000 miles to have our paperwork processed by a guy who took a 2 year job with the US Embassy, who happens to live 5 miles from us. Small world, go figure… Needless to say the rest of our 10 minute meeting went just fine and we were on our way to start our tour for the day.
Next stop was to Old Delhi. Delhi is a city with two identities. New Delhi is representative of its colonial British rule. It’s apparent in the architecture and design of the streets (many roundabouts). Old Delhi is much older and shows it’s influence from the Mogul rulers of centuries ago, with it’s Islamic architecture and mosques. One of which was the largest mosque in India called the “Jama Masjid”. We stopped there and walked through the mosque; Zeena had to wear a cover since she was wearing short sleeves and capri pants (check out the guy on the cell phone!). On our exit, we took rickshaws for what we thought would be a “short little ride” to the Red Fort. Boy, were we in for an adventure! Our ride took us through the Chawari Bazzar, which ended up becoming a 1 hour whirlwind tour of a crowded bazaar that looked right out of a movie, but in fact it was the real thing. There were twists and turns through alleys, total gridlock where no one could move for minutes at a time, all sorts of close calls with scooters, other rickshaws and pedestrians. This is not recommended for those who are even remotely claustrophobic, because there are a lot of people in a very small space with all kinds of commotion going on. It was amazing to see how the crowd just flowed in chaotic elegance, and in the end everyone got where they needed to. With a little bit luck, we got to where we needed to be which was to the Red Fort.
The Red Fort “Lal Qila” was built by Mogul Emporor Shah Jahan (also the builder of the Taj Mahal) in 1638. It’s a magnificent Fort built to fortify the Mogul palace and his personal grounds. It’s now more like a park with people relaxing in the courtyards enjoying what has been nice weather, a bit warm but not stifling hot like we expected. We then finished off our tour with a drive by of the parliament and presidential buildings and a quick walk through the Gate of India, where we happened to see the changing of the guards ceremony. All in all, today was the day I realized that I was in India. I was truly amazed at the diversity of culture and history, even though I’ve only seen a small fraction of the country, but I have a new found respect and fascination for the land of my origins.
Monday, October 13, 2008
The Day Zeena Went Down
The night before our flight to New Delhi I started to get feverish. I took some Tylenol but a few hours later the symptoms got worse, and let’s just say it took the maximum dosages of Tylenol and Immodium to get me on the plane to Delhi the next morning! All blog entries about the pleasantries of flying in India are now retracted, because the Jaipur airport was a bit of a nightmare (smaller airport) and combined with my illness, the trip was tough. Once in Delhi though we checked into our super nice room and I slept, and drugged myself up, and slept. I didn’t emerge from the room until this morning after Azeem arrived to our room. YES! Azeem is here!
I write about this because it’s part of the experience. The lesson learned is two-fold: don’t get overconfident, and ALWAYS travel with Tylenol and Immodium. Instead of posting pictures of me sleeping in a bed, I decided to litter the blog entry with all my favorite beautiful pictures in India. The first sunset is from Yasmin’s place, the second from our hotel in Mumbai, and the third from our hotel here in Delhi. The pool shot is in Jaipur.
A few hours after Azeem got here today we went to the US embassy to file Zaleeya’s visa forms. We arrived in our taxi to find the embassy CLOSED. After watching and being careful about all the Indian holidays, we forgot today is COLUMBUS DAY. Hilarous! Luckily we have 2 more days here so it won’t be an issue, but alas we all got a good chuckle out of this one. I can see Tami (our amazing adoption coordinator from Dillon) rolling over in her sleep as I type.
Anyhow hopefully tomorrow I can join the men and gallivant a bit in Delhi and see the town. We pick up Zaleeya a week from today!
Friday, October 10, 2008
The Day I Rode an Elephant!
The history of Jaipur is also interesting, as it’s a town with a rich and long story. The main attraction is the Amer fort, which was built by the Hindu king Man Singh about 400 plus years ago. Man’s sister was married off to the Muslim Moghul king Akber the Great which made for the first major Hindu/Muslim alliance and in turn helped to expand the Moghul Empire in India.
Upon arriving in Jaipur on Thursday night, I knew immediately we were in the country. The roads were less crowded and I could see (even in the dark) wide open countryside. Our hotel was beautiful, however I couldn’t really appreciate the beauty until I awoke the next day to the most amazing lake view! I’ve included a picture of course.
We rented a car/driver who took us to Amer fort and requested an English tour guide to help us for the day. As soon as we got out of the car we got ushered into the area where we were encouraged to board an elephant for a ride up to the fort! Yes, an elephant! Luckily boarding this gigantic monster was easy as we walked up a set of stairs to a platform at the level of the top of the elephant. I wasn’t fearful at all as we climbed on and slowly started our rocky accent up to the top of the fort. Our poor elephant seemed to be a bit lazy as were passed by another elephant, but eventually we made it. The pictures from this part are amazing, especially of my father donning his new hat. Maharaja (King) Mohamed rules the fort!
The fort itself was interesting as we toured with our guide who spoke a variation of English. Honestly I struggled to understand his broken, often repetitive phraseology but he was gracious and pointed out some beautiful things we would not have noticed otherwise. Along the fort we saw some snake charmers (Rajni I had to mention this!). Yes real snakes! I was nervous to even get close enough to drop off my 10 rupee tip.
After a grueling few hours in the heat at the fort we ventured into some shopping area where we watched them make rugs, textiles and jewels. We decided to spend our second day dedicated in Jaipur to shopping! After the fort and a stop of a quick Indian lunch, we headed to the City Palace where we saw some interesting astronomical equipment (ala Galileo). I guess Man Singh’s heir Jai Singh was a big fan and had an entire area dedicated to devices to help him read the sun, moon and stars. If I didn’t already miss my husband, this sealed the deal. He would have enjoyed this!
If you can believe, in the span of 24 hours in Jaipur, we met some lovely (notice use of word) business travelers from Laguna Niguel and then ran into some Ismailis from the San Fernando Valley at the City Palace! Small, small world.
For the Dillon moms interested in maybe visiting Jaipur, I would recommend 2 days here; there isn’t that much to see however the fort is worth it and it is quite relaxing. Make sure you choose a nice hotel since you will spend most of your time here; unlike the bustling big city of Mumbai this is more of a resort style local. We are at the Trident hotel which is beautiful and has a nice restaurant with good food.
Anyhow today (Saturday) is a day of rest including some pool time and shopping. We head off early to Delhi tomorrow where we start expanding our traveling crew: Azeem comes Monday and my cousin Farah flies in from Kabul on Wednesday. Here we start the paperwork process for Zaleeya and the realism of why we are here is starting to set in!
Random Thoughts of Mumbai
TIFFINWALA (aka Dubawalla): My father bragged about this for days and we planned to go see this phenomenon at work in downtown Mumbai. Many of the local suburb families make food for the husbands/ wives who work downtown. This food is placed in a tall series of tin cans called tiffins (like Tupperware) and then placed in a cloth bag. This food is collected by a collector in the morning and sent on an unimaginable journey by train, then bike or push cart to the recipient downtown. Imagine 500,000 tiffins delivered on time, at their exact desired location, with no computer assistance! And this service costs less than 300 rupees a month ($8). At around 12pm each day you can watch the tiffins unloaded from the train station and then distributed to the motorbike/pushcart delivers. My father has likened this to the "fedex" of food delivery service.
Unfortunately, the day we planned to watch this at work, happened to be a holiday! Silly Americans forgetting that there are MANY holidays in October in India as the Hindus have a 9 day festival at the beginning of the month (Navrati) and then Diwali, the festival of lights on Oct 28th. Anyhow I was sad to have missed this, but thought it was worth the mention. Oh and I did include a pic of out hotel decorated with flowers for the end of Navrati festival.
CRICKET: This games is HUGE here and I finally got to see some playing. My father was the captain of his high school team so he's quite versed in the sport and he has been attempting to teach me the rules. Currently there is a Indian/Australian "test match" going on which is quite important and on a lot of the news stations. Australia is the best team currently, therefore the Indian team loyalty is in full force. I've included a great action pic of some locals playing in the big field in downtown Mumbai.
SERVICE: I’m not sure why Indians can’t seem to get it right in the states, but the service here to far in India has been excellent! I believe it’s the “upper class/ lower class” divide that makes the workers in the hotels and restaurants incredibly gracious and helpful. In the hotels, each employee you pass in the hall greets you with hello or Namaste and jumps at any request or opportunity to open your door. I’ve included a pic of our afternoon fruit service at our hotel in Mumbai.
AIR TRAVEL: I must admit to having been a bit nervous getting into our car heading to the airport for our flight to Jaipur. How ridiculous this seems now as the experience was better than in the states! Again the upper class here seem to have it made as the airport was shiny, clean, air conditioned and offered excellent customer service. The airplane was brand spanking new, had great leg room, offered DELICIOUS Indian food and left and landed EXACTLY on time. In fact from the time we landed to the time we were in our car, it took 15 minutes (fast baggage claim!).
Anyhow I’m in Jaipur now and have a host of new experiences to share but you’ll just have to wait for the next blog entry.
Yoga, In India
It’s quite intimidating here, and actually nearly impossible to “drop in” to a class. Most studios require you to go through a medical check up with a doctor and have rigorous beginner programs for people starting out. So “jumping” into a Vinyasa Flow class like I do at home just clearly became an impossibility.
However with the cost of labor being as low as it is, the best plan was to have a Yoga instructor come to my room for a private session (little over $30). I was given a name from the hotel concierge of a gentleman named Mr. Anshol, who was to arrive at my room at 7am the next morning. I wondered how this would work; would he cue me and push me like I do with my Pilates clients at home? Or would we just meditate for an hour? Was he an old swami type with ragged clothes? Or a modern young yogi wearing Lululemon and donning a cell phone?
He ended up being quite young (late 20’s) and showed up at my door in jeans and a button down shirt. I must say this surprised me; I was at least expecting someone in exercise clothes! However immediately he asked me a few questions, we got to work, and I forgot what he was wearing and the awkwardness of working out in a hotel room.
He keyed into my back issues immediately and forced me into immediate relaxation breathing (lying face up on pillows). Then he started with a series of standing postures in no particular order or flow. Some I recognized (triangle pose, high lunge, chair pose, camel etc) and others were familiar but different. There was a LOT of back bending- something I’ve avoided recently however I know this is the root of “real” yoga. Within 20 minutes I was sweating and feeling my body working hard.
In his strong Indian accent he would say things like “sit in this position for a bit and feel the intensity” and “visualize your back and stretch it out”. He gave me tips on some positions and others he let me feel it and just pushed me deeper. Honestly, it was similar to a session I would receive at home, minus the oddly dressed Indian man and the backdrop of the Arabian Sea.
I loved his blend of mental with physical as he ended our session with some relaxation breathing and visualization. He mentioned that often the “mental/ spiritual” element of Yoga is missing in the states- something I know I need to work on. He was all in all very polite and respectful and obviously knowledgeable. My body and mind felt energized and I was happy I experienced an Indian version of my newfound love of Yoga.